For something so vanilla (relatively speaking), hand jobs can still be weirdly intimidating?Blog jobs might get all the glory, but wielding the power of a really amazing handy is life-changing. Thankfully, we’ve rounded up some sex experts to explain exactly what to do.
1. It’s all mental. Jacqui Oliver, a psycho-sexual relationship consultant, says to get your guy started by getting him to imagine the hot and heavy stuff that’s about to go down. Don’t be afraid to talk dirty! Getting into the right mindset can turn second base from a pit stop on the way to sex to the actual destination.
2. Hold him steady. Oliver says to make a “V” shape with your thumb and pointer finger to support the base of his penis and adding slight downward pressure. This holds his penis in place as he becomes erect so it doesn’t “bounce” around too much.
3. Stretch it out. Apply some lube in your other hand, and slowly stretch out the length of his penis with your other hand (your thumb should be pointing down towards his balls). Once your lubed hand nears the top of his penis, you can bring your support hand up and repeat the same slow stretch. Repeat until you’re both impressed by your hand dexterity.
4. Use your fingers. Sure, it’s called a hand job, but using your finger pads to create a delicate touch can be super stimulating and unexpected. Antonia Hall, a psychologist and relationship expert, suggests using the pads of your fingers and lubrication to glide up and down his shaft.
5. Keep an eye out for his sweet spots. Hall explains that the frenulum (under the tip of his penis), the perineum (area just beneath his balls), and the base of his penis are three sensitive spots to pay extra attention to. You’ll want to make sure you stimulate these areas somehow.
6. Ask your partner! Jennifer Rahner, a sex educator, says that watching your partner touch themselves and asking what they like is the most efficient way to become a pro at handies. Whether your partner prefers lots of lube or just a little (uncircumcised guys sometimes enjoy stimulation without lube, says Rahner), or if he likes a light touch or a firm touch, the best way to figure it out is to ask.
7. Read their signals. Just because you’ve asked them what they like, it doesn’t mean you can zone out and just phone it in until he climaxes. You’ll also want to pay close attention to his body language during stimulation. “Listen to your partner’s body — their breath, their noises, the way they move,” says Rahner. “These can all show signs that you’re on the right track.”
8. Free up a hand. Emily Morse, a doctor of Human Sexuality, and host of the Sex with Emily podcast, explains. First you’ll need a really good silicone lube because duh = more movement, more lube. Morse recommends SKYN Maximum Performance which is silicone based and long lasting. We’re also big fans of Lelo’s lube as it feels luxe AF and comes in the most beautiful bottle ever. Once you’re lubed enough, try seamlessly bringing your hand from the base of his shaft up and over his head, squeezing gently on his head, and then working your way back down. Feel free to use your other hand for stimulating yourself and putting on a bit of a show for him.
Comments
Post a Comment